Flipping Off the Police Can Make You Money

Posted by Jim at August 6th, 2007

One night during college I was sitting in a friend’s car and talking. As I was talking I would occasionally make a gesture with my hands. At one point, I raised my index finger as I explained something.

As I did this a campus police car came around the corner, drove past the car (which was parallel parked) and stopped.

The policeman (who I can only assume had stopped one too many parties that weekend) got out of the car, knocked on the window and then proceeded to lecture me on how I had no right to flip him off.

I wasn’t able to persuade him that I’d raised a different finger. Fortunately, he didn’t bother (or didn’t have the ability) to charge me with anything.

Oddly enough, to judge from the following article, it appears that I might have been paid thousands of dollars if he had.

Motorist who made obscene gesture to cop awarded $3,000

It makes me start to reconsider my tendency toward being respectful of authority.

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The Boy in the Bubble

Posted by Jim at August 1st, 2007

When I was a kid, I remember reading about “the boy in the bubble.”

You may remember that? A boy with some sort of immune deficiency disorder was put in a plastic bubble practically from the moment he was born.

I never remember hearing whether he’d died or eventually left the bubble. It turns out that he did die and that his story was sadder than I remember the press reporting it.

The Boy in the Bubble article…

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Massive Boar Not As Wild As You Might Think

Posted by Jim at June 2nd, 2007

It turns out that the huge boar killed by an 11 year old boy recently had only been released into the wild six days prior to being shot.

I had wondered about that. The bit about the kid’s father and others being ready to shoot the pig with rifles if it threatened him made it sound like one of those farms where you pay to shoot something.

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Massive Boar Killed

Posted by Jim at May 25th, 2007

Apparently an 11 year old killed a 1051 pound boar recently.

Am I the only one who instantly thinks of Princess Mononoke when I see the photo? I’m thinking specifically of this.

Posted in Narrative, Random Weirdness| 3 Comments | 

Check Your Mail for My Liver

Posted by Jim at March 2nd, 2007

In a move worthy of some sort of gross out comedy, a local couple recieved body parts wrapped in plastic in their mail. Police are concerned that more body parts may be destined for other unsuspecting people.

Where, I wonder, does a person order body parts by mail? Do they have catalogs? Can you order them on Amazon.com? For that matter, I like to think that if I sent body parts by mail for a living I would be pretty careful about where they were sent.

For those of you with more interest I direct you to a local television station:

Body parts by mail

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Kneel Before Zod!

Posted by Jim at February 25th, 2007

The 2008 presidential campaign seems to have started much too early. If you’re already sick of Hillary, Obama, McCain, Giuliani and such, I’d like to point out another possible candidate:

General Zod of Krypton

I’m not saying he’d be a good ruler (unless you like brutal oppression), but at least you’d know what you were getting.

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Two Dreams

Posted by Jim at February 1st, 2007

I don’t often remember my dreams, but here are two that I’ve remembered lately that may amuse you.

Dream One: The Armadillo
I dreamed that I had given my brother an armadillo for a Christmas present. Everyone seemed okay with this, but I was nonetheless bothered.

I was worrying about the damage it would likely do to their house in terms of digging through carpets and such. Also, I’d be surprised if turned out that armadillos could be litter trained.

Dream Two: Vet Appointment
Like all responsible pet owners, we try to get our cats in for shots every so often. On the day before their appointment, I dreamed that Kristen, my sister, and I were outside trying to catch them as they’d gotten out for some reason. We were using a car that was my sister’s (but is not in reality actually her car).

After we chased them for a while, we were suddenly all together (including our cats) at a bar. I don’t remember details of this except that Manuel Noriega was there with one of his generals (I could tell by the hat).

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But If I Did Get Superpowers, I’d Like Flight and Telepathy and Super Martial Art Buttkicking Skills

Posted by Jim at January 10th, 2007

I don’t know if it happens to you, but sometimes I wonder what happened to people I know from high school. Specifically, I’ve occasionally wondered about Erik Prince, a person with whom I was on the track team. We weren’t close or anything, but I talked to him every once in a while. Also, his parents were wealthy and financed my class’s high school graduation party.

A few days ago, someone told me that he owned a com pany that supplied mercenaries to protect people in Iraq. “Oh,” I thought to myself, “that’s interesting. So that’s what he’s doing now.”

And then today, this:

Erik Prince, the secretive, mega-millionaire, right-wing Christian founder of Blackwater, the private security firm that has built a formidable mercenary force in Iraq, champions his company as a patriotic extension of the U.S. military. These mercenary units in Iraq, including Blackwater, contain some 20,000 fighters. They unleash indiscriminate and wanton violence against unarmed Iraqis, have no accountability and are beyond the reach of legitimate authority. The appearance of these paramilitary fighters, heavily armed and wearing their trademark black uniforms, patrolling the streets of New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina, gave us a grim taste of the future.

(From David Brin’s blog, scroll down a bit in the post and you’ll find it in context)

In a science fiction novel or comic book, this would undoubtedly be preparatory to me getting superhuman abilities and lead to a dramatic confrontation in the halls of Blackwater’s HQ. *

In reality of course, superpowers are not forthcoming and it remains very, very strange to find someone you knew mentioned on your favorite author’s blog as a possible source of theocratic dictatorship.

I’ve got to admit though, that I don’t think that either Erik or Blackwater is particularly likely to try to end democracy. The article that Brin pulls the quote from has a certain conspiracy theory quality to it that I can’t quite pin down. It might be that as someone who is a Christian and comes out of an evangelical background, I don’ t know anybody who’d be for a theocracy. In fact, on the rare occasions that I’ve been in Christian bookstores, I’ve been amused to notice multiple Christian, political thrillers in which the presumably atheistic left puts a dictatorship in place.

If nothing else, US citizens of all stripes share a common anxiety.

* Clarification: For those of you who don’t ever read comics or science fiction, it’s worth mentioning that it’s pretty common to have someone that the main character likes turn up later doing something that they disagree with. It’s a good way to ratchet up the tension. It’s kind of overused though.

Posted in Life As We Know It, Politics, Random Weirdness| 8 Comments | 

Drunk at the Grand Rapids Symphony

Posted by Jim at November 18th, 2006

Kristen went to the Grand Rapids Symphony last night. She went with my sister because I was going to a role playing game.

When I got home she complained that some people in the row in front of her were drunk and hollering at the points where you could applaud. Apparently, the people next to her actually moved because they didn’t want to sit directly behind these people.

I’d never imagined the Grand Rapids Symphony as something that could be improved with copious quantities of alcohol. Drunkenness seems like something you’d do at a more popular event like a hockey game (”HEY NUMBNUTS!”) * or a rock concert.

UPDATE: According to Kristen, I missed many of the more annoying activities of the drunken women in the row ahead of her. Thus it’s worth noting that they also:
1. Sang along
2. Swayed along with the music
3. Pretended to direct the orchestra

Their ages? Fifty-ish according to Kristen. In short, old enough to know better.

* Actual quote (among many, many others) from a very drunken man I got to sit behind at a Griffins‘ game. And did I ever tell you about the Red Sox vs. Yankees game I once attended? We got seated behind an entire bar full of people. At least that’s what I guessed from their identical t-shirts. I can only assume that they’d hung out there before the game because they certainly had no need to get beer at the stadium (which didn’t stop them) and shouted abuse at the Yankees practically from the beginning to the end of the game. My dad likes the Yankees, but I don’t remember him being particularly vocal about that at the time. Maybe he should have been drinking.

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Will It Blend?

Posted by Jim at November 10th, 2006

In an effort to move this blog away from political commentary and back into more typical stuff, I point out the following site: Will It Blend?.

While it’s primarily an attempt to plug a brand of blenders, it does offer a series of videos in which a man in a white lab coat places various objects into a blender to test if they will blend.

The answer is almost always yes.

P.S. The one where he blends the rake handle amuses me. Oh yeah, also the Coke can.

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